Smart Love
So you may have found someone special online, but to make the relationship last it’s time to practice smart love:
Love makes you feel good - whether it’s watching a classic film romance, reading a love story or actually being swept off your own feet, Love changes us. Everything just seems better when you’re in love, because it makes you happier! The happiness we get from being in love is a wonderful thing; however you can get carried away. Love can cloud our judgment causing irrationality and naivety, because romance itself is irrational, the notion of giving up everything for someone else is not a rational one. So to make sure your love lasts and continues making you happy, be romantic but stay smart too!
Smart Love means paying attention to values –
Discovering the person’s value system should be a top priority. You can observe a person’s values by seeing how they treat others from the waiter to their mother. Also look at what makes them laugh, they might find something funny that you find offensive, or they might not take things too seriously like you.
Smart Love means not trying to change others -
Many people go into a relationship disregarding some of the other person’s big flaws, believing they can change them. You shouldn’t go into a relationship for the wrong reasons, if you find real flaws in the other person but continue to date them, thinking that the love you have will change them, you are probably more in love with the idea of a romantic relationship than the other person. Also the person will probably never change, or if they do it might cause them to be unhappy in themselves.
Smart Loves means you remain yourself –
As well as not trying to change the other person, you have to remember not to change yourself either! The love you have for someone might cause you to try and please them and this might mean doing things that just aren’t you. If a person really loves you then they will want you to be yourself, so don’t try and be something you’re not, this is a common pitfall people in love.
Smart Love doesn’t run from conflict –
The first fight of a relationship can be hard to deal with, you are still finding your comfort zone with the other person and getting to know each other. Often couples will have the first argument and then feel embarrassed and try to make up with each other without really resolving the issue. But to have a healthy relationship you need to communicate your feelings to one another and try and resolve any issues you have, don’t gloss over disagreements because you’re afraid the relationship will end.